Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Misunderstanding

Last night the kids and I went jogging. Jess helped get them ready to go and wisely instructed Jayson to go to the bathroom before we left on the run. He promptly responded, "No thanks. I will just go outside".

Oops.
Unintended consequence of the Fathers and Sons campout.
I guess I should have better explained that we save outside "relief" for "special occasions".
Like camping.
Or when you're out toiletpapering the neighborhood at 3 in the morning.

Sunday, May 9, 2010

Fathers and Sons

I went on a Fathers and Sons campout for the first time in probably 30 years. This time as a father. Jayson has been talking about going camping since I first proposed the idea two weeks ago. He was really looking forward to sleeping in a tent and cooking hotdogs and marshmallows on a fire. He has constantly been reminding me what the girls have taught him, "It's not 'fathers and daughters', it's 'fathers and sons'". I was excited for two weeks myself, but I must admit, driving home from work on Friday, I was a little apprehensive about taking a two year old on an overnight campout. As it turns out, once he mastered the art of going "number 1" in the woods, everthing turned out pretty slick....

This was the picture Jess took of us just before we headed out the door. We went with the Sunset Ward up to a property just past Henefer up Ogden Canyon. We pitched our tent right next to a tire swing that was attached to a large branch about 30 feet in the air. Jayson loved the swing (after the first freak out when he realized he was about 15 feet off the ground with the first push). We swang the first night and early the next morning. He was freezing cold in this picture and teeth chattering with shivers, but he insisted he wasn't cold so he could keep swinging.

This next picture was Jayson as we were on our hike with the group up to Witches Rocks. The whole time he just kept telling me, "This is soooo fun Daddy, this is sooo fun".
This is us just after the Bishop finished telling us a story. We were in a little clearing amidst the towering "Witches Rocks" all around us.
There wasn't really a place for us to ride the ATV and this was the part Jayson was looking forward to the most. He has been dying to ride the ATV "in the mountains" since we bought it this Winter. So after we cleaned up our campground, we drove to Centerville and rode the ATV in the mountains on the dirt roads where I grew up. Jayson squealed and laughed for over an hour before it was time to head home.
He is already talking about when we get to go camping again next year. Not sure I am ready to tell he that we can really go camping whenever we want, we don't actually have to wait for next years Fathers and Sons.






















Thursday, April 22, 2010

Fat




We were sitting by the computer, chilling as a family.
Jess referred me to a picture she was looking at of our family vacation to Southern California a few years ago. She told me, "Sean, check out this picture and look at how far you've come".
I pulled up the picture.

I must admit, it was a little weird to look at. Kinda made me sick to my stomach.
It got a little more awkward when Rylee wandered over to the monitor.

Rylee (all matter-of-fact): "Oh my gosh you're fat!"

Thanks Rylee.



The only Rylee moment more precious than that was when we were sitting in the chapel right after sacrament meeting a few years back. Rylee's primary teacher was about 9 months pregnant and talking with Jessica. As she walked away, Jessica was telling Rylee that her teacher was about to have a baby, and that she had a baby in her tummy.

Rylee promptly turned to me, pointed to my stomach, and asked, "When are you going to have your baby?"

Once again, Thanks Rylee.

Thursday, April 1, 2010

The Karate Kid


One more brilliant move to bring me one step closer to earning the coveted "father of the year" award.

A few weeks ago we ran into the classic "Karate Kid" playing on cable. Brought back a lot of memories.
The classic family tale of Daniel Larusso forced by his mom to relocate across the country, moving into a neighborhood full of black belt bullies, mentored by Mr. Miyagi's unorthodox methods.
The kids started watching it with us near the end, right before Daniel's big tournament.
The anticipation of my favorite line, "Get him a body bag!!" kept me riveted on the show; and apparently clouded my judgement. Parental Guidance was suggested by the Motion Picture Association of America, so for some reason, I thought it was a good idea to allow the kids to watch the show with me.
After Johnny "swept the leg" it looked like all was lost. Three little faces in my living room were very concerned and very worried for Daniel. (I would have been to if I didn't know how it all ended.) Fortunately, though Japanese healing magic took care of the problem and Daniel Larusso returned to the mat to finish what he started. Honestly, who really saw that coming???
Fortunately for all of us, with the score tied 2-2, and only able to stand on one leg, Daniel-son used the move Mr. Miyagi taught him. The one where he stands on his one good leg, with arms extended outward, hands oddly pointed downward. Mr. Miyagi nods his approval. This was the move, Miyagi told him, if performed correctly, can't be defended against. Daniel-son capitalized on this opportunity. He rose up and kicked Johnny right in the face to win the match. Just like I remembered.

The girls were really impressed with that final move. They all wanted to try it. Tayler and Rylee turned it into more of a funky, semi-graceful dance move. Jayson tried it too.

It seemed like good quality family time--a great way to spend an evening as a family. We all basked in the joy of Daniel's victory over Johnny. We all practiced the final move. (Except Jess. Who seemed to think we were all idiots.)
Seemed like such a great idea at the time.

Until last night when I was sitting on the end of our sectional, minding my own business. Jayson came up and stood on the couch by me. Then he raised up and kicked me in the face. He was so excited. It was beautifully executed. Much better than when we practiced after the movie. He laughed and bragged, "Daddy, I kicked you in the face".

It was then that a strange thought crossed my mind. "Maybe the PG rating was there for a reason." Maybe smart parents don't let their two year old boys watch movies about karate, fighting, and violence. Hopefully Jayson will grow up to be more like Daniel-son instead of Johnny--in spite of his father's lack of judgement.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

When you gotta go...you gotta go.

Interesting little ending to my Saturday workout.

After my spin class, I drove over to the running/bike trail that runs parallel to the Legacy Highway. I parked in Farmington and ran two miles before turning back towards the car. Since it was still relatively early and cold, I only saw about ten other people along the trail. I was probably about 200 yards from my car when I noticed a couple running towards me about 100 yards away. She was wearing pink and black and he was wearing all blue. Often times I have a tendency to run looking down at the path, rather than straight ahead, so I wondered where the girl disappeared to as I passed her husband who was now running alone. Hopefully I wasn't going to be the last eye witness to a spouse or girlfriend disappearance.

Fortunately, about twenty seconds later, I saw her.

Unfortunately, though, I saw most of her.

She was squatting, underwear and running pants around her ankles, about 10 feet off the trail; relieving herself, completely shielded from the sight of unsuspecting joggers by the 12 inch high weeds that line the trail. Her head was down, no doubt providing the re-assurance that if she couldn't see people running along the trail, nobody could see her.

She looked up as I passed.

All I could do was shake my head and smile.

She must've really had to go bad. She couldn't possibly have waited 20 more seconds for me to run past???


On a less revealing note...
My kids have a real problem interrupting Jess and I while we are on the phone. Saturday afternoon, while on the phone with my sister, Rylee had something soooo important to tell me. She interrupted me once.
Then she interrupted me a second time (thirty seconds later).
Both times I asked her to wait until I got off the phone.

On the third interruption, I covered up the phone and asked Rylee why she was interrupting me again after I had asked her a million times not to interrupt me while I was on the phone.

She looked at me blankly.
With no facial expression she responded, "Two times. You asked me two times. Not a million."

She gets that from her mother.




Tuesday, February 16, 2010

Maverick Day Spa

Last night on the way to the airport, we stopped off at Maverick to drop off a DVD at Redbox.
Did a double take when I saw a lady coming out of Maverick wearing a white terrycloth robe and slippers.
A guy was waiting for her in a car parked by mine.
I had to look.
He too was wearing a white terrycloth robe.
A very short, white terrycloth robe.

At first it seemed wierd.
Then I just had a hankerin' for a 64 oz Coke.
And a facial and massage.

Sunday, February 14, 2010

My Two "Valentines"

Jess frequently hints at her dislike for some of my blog posts. I think it's because I don't chronicle the daily events in an online journal. So, with her out of town, I will provide a journal-type rundown of the weekend for her benefit.

Jess took Jackson and Rylee to her brother's house in Denver for their baby blessing. I settled in for a little Valentine's weekend fun with Tayler and Jayson.

Saturday we headed to Ogden to Fat Cats for pizza and bowling. This is our self-taken photo at the Pizza Factory.

This is Jayson at the bowling alley. He stood up with a foot on each of two swiveling bowling chairs, raised his hands, and yelled, "I a RockStar Dad!!!". Then he promptly fell off. The camera captured his descent.
Tayler patiently helped Jayson bowl every turn. Then they waited the 45 minutes for his ball to make it down the alley to the pins.
Tayler is pretty competitive. She didn't like that I was soundly beating her the entire game. The only fun part about Jess not being with us is that I got to win. My personal best. 151. Four strikes and two spares. (Three strikes in a row. TURKEY!!!)


Jayson cheered every single turn. Even his gutter balls.




Saturday we bought an ice cream maker and all the ingredients for homemade ice cream. Tayler wanted Strawberry--fittingly pink for valentines day.


Notice Jayson's little ice cream bowl, scooted a good two feet out into the middle of the island. Apparently, he's decided he doesn't like strawberry ice cream. Fortunately, I divided the ingredients so we can make a batch of something else that he might like better. Reeses Peanut butter cup. We'll see.

So far, so good Jess.
Translation: we are all still alive and well fed.
Coinciently, I have angled the camera so that we didn't capture much of the mess in the kitchen, dining room and living room. As usual, we are only cleaning up once this weekend (right before you get home). But don't stress, it will be clean (mostly) by the time we leave to get you at the airport tomorrow night. Well, let's be honest; the house will be "straightened up" before we come get you.